Our home is too good for a poor man

We have a friend, his name is Gary. Gary is a homeless man that lives under a bridge in our city. We made friends with him last year while we were studying for exams at Starbucks and we spotted him rummaging through the garbage can just outside in the pouring rain. We learned that he believes in God but has been very hurt by the church in the past, he has a family and a couple kids. But these were the cards he was dealt. We will often see him sitting on the median at a major intersection making his living on red lights. He always brings a smile to our faces. Sometimes we go out of our way just to get in that one lane that will give us 30 seconds to talk to Gary. The change in our ash tray belongs to him. We've had the joy of having chats with him ( longer than what the red light permits) and have had many opportunities to share more about our faith in Jesus, and he's decided that he would really like to come out to our school chapels. We're very excited for this day! A little while ago, someone burned down his 'home'. Matt and a friend ran into him and heard his story, so we did everything possible to help him out and get him 'back on his feet'. Gary doesn't have much.

Oddly, I think this way too.

Too many times I have found my self complaining about living in such a small apartment (even though we have one of the larger ones on campus), or wishing that i could open my cupboards to find an array of the top notch cooking and baking utensils. Too many times have I longed for pictures on my walls or new, color coated towels for our bathroom ( I've even thought of guest towels!). My most recent longing is for frying pans that don't wiggle on the stove burner and chairs that match my kitchen table. An obvious necessity. "Matt, I really wish we had____", "Matt, I think we really need____".

Just a few days ago ( Wednesday), I was cooking up some concoction in the kitchen and Matt announced that he was going to go try and find Gary and see if he wanted to come to Chapel that night. With much excitement that our friend might come to church with us that night I quickly decided to make a little extra supper in hopes that maybe he'd also come for diner. Then the strangest thing happened. While chopping the veggies, I became painfully ashamed of our home. Not because we had so little, but because we had SO much! No longer did I look at our naked walls and my unmatched towels and see how little I had, but I looked at our ceiling and realized I have a roof over my head and 4 walls to keep the wind out. I have a big comfy couch and a 32" TV. Our cupboards are full of food and I know we will be crawling onto a queen size, pillow top mattress every night. I was ashamed of how much we had and how badly I didn't want Gary to see how well we live.

Gary didn't make it for chapel, or diner. I put the left overs in our fridge.

Anticipation

Hi everyone!
Matt writing here, first blog of the marriage! So excited that we have a way of updating our friends and family who we can't be close to! It's never easy being away from family, especially at a time like this. But we are overly blessed in what we have been given, and we strive to see those blessings every day.
Last night I went to the first chapel practice of the year. at the very beginning of the summer, me and Nik both felt that this was going to be a season of God equipping me in the ministry that he has placed me in. no more renting equipment. no more frustration with different gear every week. And so, I now find myself blessed with a brand spanking new gretsch tennessee rose and vox ac15.

Life couldn't be better.


or so i thought.


Last night, as i said, we had first chapel practice. God showed up in such a real way, such a tangible way. i can honestly tell you that I don't get nervous for practices anymore. But last night was different. in the hours leading up to practice, i began to sweat and just felt the nerves creeping up on me. I started wondering what was going on. "haven't I gotten past this? I have been playing long enough now, surely, that i don't need to be nervous about practice?"
My good friend Clark Moran helped me put it all into perspective. I wasn't nervous about playing. I was nervous about stepping into God's presence. Exodus 20:18-19 says "When the people saw the thunder and lightning and heard the trumpet and saw the mountain in smoke, they trembled with fear. They stayed at a distance and said to Moses, 'Speak to us yourself and we will listen. But do not have God speak to us or we will die.'" (NIV)The Israelites had such a reverence for God that they knew that if they heard his voice they would die! Yet we come to chapels and just expect God to show up, touch us, and then leave as if nothing ever happened.


I want more than that!


And so with this new perspective, this new understanding of the nerves i was feeling, we had practice. i began to pray that the nerves would never leave. I hope i never lose the reverence of God's presence, that I treat it like another show. this is God we are talking about! The God that created the heavens and the earth! The God that created you and me! This is huge!
So we would just ask that you keep this Wednesday night in prayer. this school is truly steeped in anticipation for what God will do. You must understand that this is not normal. For the past two years that I have been here, this sense of excitement hasn't really been present. We truly believe that God is up to something.


We believe that God has moved his pieces.


Now its our turn.


Let's move.




Matt

Oh, Hello!

Welcome to our blog! We are Matt and Nicole (a.k.a Nikki) Carroll. Newlyweds from Newfoundland, living in BC. We've created this blog because we are so far away from home and deeply miss our family and friends. We've created it hoping to stay connected with the ones we love and continue to do life with them. We also want to share our faith and love, joys and struggles, lessons and experiences with everyone we know. God has blessed us so greatly with His love, grace and faithfulness that we want to share it with the world!

We are currently attending Bible College at Summit Pacific. Matt is entering his last year in Intercultural Studies and I (Nikki) am entering my 3rd year in Counselling foundations. Where will this take us? We have no idea, and we're totally okay with that. I got to college certain i would enter full-time, overseas missions. But as God directed me to switch out of intercultural studies, into counselling foundations, and as He led me into the most exciting journey of my life-marriage, I began to think a little differently and find myself back to thinking: I have no idea what my life will look like. But, this time around I know that, more than anything, I want to serve my God and support my hubby. You see, my hubs is very gifted. He's one of those guys you kinda love to hate because he can do anything. And if he comes up against something he's not so good at (golf) he will work and work until he is. But the thing he is best at is music- specifically worshiping God with music. God has given him an anointing, and we believe He has great plans for us. :)

Right now God is teaching us how to trust Him. I was under the impression I had this covered- I was good to go! After all, I backpacked Europe trusting and relying on God! Well, either i forgot how to trust, or i grew up and lost my 'child-like' faith. I'm thinkin' it's a bit of both. Suddenly we find ourselves up against a quickly approaching jam packed, term which I will be just too busy to work. Not to mention how often I come come from my job (i'm a waitress at Boston Pizza) feeling emotionally and physically exhausted, used, unappreciated and broken. This morning, after many tears, Hubs and I decided that my time at BP is up. I've been wanting to leave for quite a while now, but i was constantly lured back in by the love of money. God wants to be our provider now and teach us to trust Him. I must admit, i'm a little scared. I'm a hard worker and I guess i have been tricked into believing that i must work hard to gain His provision- even though i would have been the first to point out the fallacy in this. But I know my God is good and faithful. And i'm excited to have a season where i can focus on Him and allow Him to provide. Sometimes God will ask us to take a step of faith and to trust Him. Well, we're stepping out. trusting.

-nik